got a ticket to ride

will be off tomorrow for a performance test of high importance.

wish me luck.

issues of idealism

lately I´ve been wondering more and more about the existence of any real body ideal in the blogosphere.

to put this first I am not very fond of the idea of ideals myself as they don´t leave room for individual aspects of what might be appreciated if the common sense didn´t manipulate one´s impressions. of course I am not free from being influenced by ideals myself, but lately I found the frequency of comments concerning nothing but weight and body incredibly tiring.

due to comments I read on my and other blogs that vary from harsh criticism (of being fat) to genuine worry (of being too skinny or unhealthy) I figure people must have an ideal or at least an idea in mind when adressing such messages to the author of a blog in a very public manner.
of course the act of putting oneself on a stage in one or the other way cultivates vulnerability and since most bloggers allow the appearance of said comments it shows they are well aware of that fact along with possessing the mental balance to deal with verbal attacks.
ironically enough, personally I got both kinds of comments since putting pictures of myself up here.
I might be skinnier now than I was in january but that is because I always am in summer due to massive fruit lust and a very busy schedule lately. my eating habits have always been affected of my state of mind and lately eating just hasn´t been a priority.
I am still body and health conscious and really, if I lose or gain a pound than that´s what it is.
in my opinion that´s it with most girls- and bloggers- out there.
one´s weight might vary but I didn´t come across a case of a girl gaining or losing half of her body weight in the blogging process so maybe people should concentrate on an overall appearance rather than giving so much importance on each and every single pound.

really, if I gave as much attention to my weight as some people do you might very well call that a disorder and believe me, I have other things to deal with.
h&m dress and shoes. only vest. random jewelry.

shoe porn

does my intense lusting after those beauties make me an objectophile?
I think the title is highly overused by I´d like to leave the figurative level here and declare that if I actually shot a porn those would get a leading part.
picture via jak&jil.

I would believe only in a God that knows how to dance. ~Friedrich Nietzsche

..so let´s pray.

hello stranger.

this is basically what I will be doing after the 15th july when all the craziness ends.

these days I am flushing myself through deadlines and stacks of paper by means of diet coke and caffeine trying to get as much of the glorious weather as I can. this means a little absence on the blogging sector but I guess as long as there is diet in the coke and I remember to eat regularly I should be fine.

picture via sophomore´s lookbook.

'Don't pay any attention to what they write about you. Just measure it in inches.' ~Andy Warhol

the weekend calls for a little fringe to shake.

also, there obviously is a serious love affair going on between me and those heels but sometimes nothing beats going barefoot besides the bonfire with braided hair, sipping gin tonics and singing abba songs.

there is summer in my veins but then again, I´ve got stacks of paper on my desk telling me that I´ve got a whole lot of work to do. I´m thinking about dealing with it the warhol way.

dress amisu. random jewelry. deichmann shoes.

I´m talented at breathing, especially exhaling. ~Dashboard Confessional

'Hands down this is the best day I can ever remember,
I'll always remember the sound of the stereo,
the dim of the soft lights,
the scent of your hair that you twirled in your fingers
and the time on the clock when we realized it's so late
and this walk that we shared together.
The streets were wet
and the gate was locked so I jumped it,
and I let you in.
And you stood at your door with your hands on my waist
and you kissed me like you meant it.'
'hands down' dashboard confessional


rediscovering old favourite bands is one of my favourite things to do. I went through piles of records today that I didn´t listen to in forever, singing along to the bright eyes, dashboard confessional and a surprisingly brilliant darren hayes. procrastination at its best.
zara shirt, amisu vest and cutoffs, random jewelry, h&m shoes.

zauberkraft.

there is a time for freaking out in life but I´m pretty certain it´s not the weekend.

I might have been a little theatrical in the last post, all in all I can appease you, I am fine.

I am somewhat stressed out lately, but nothing floods of coffee and wine won´t fix (well, or a decent girl´s night out, thank you bel, I think I made this an option a little too much lately, and we´re talking wine-induced late night bicycling!)

on another note, I had a conversation with the boyfriend the other day when he noted my constant gushing over ewan mcgregor, threatening me with the sight of him opening his own site full of ramblings about julia stegner and the likes if I didn´t stop it.

I´d be his first follower for sure.

the girl is a fairy, I can never get enough of her!

but that might be just it with me and ewan, it´s all about aesthetics.

editorial 'zauberkraft' taken from german vogue july via tsf.

quote via we heart it.

InsaneInTheMembrane.InsaneInTheBrain.

things are kind of crazy at the moment and I can´t seem to wrap my mind around it yet. one thing I know is: I am falling into the cliché of a desperate artist so expect some van gogh-ish pictures sans ear soon! (to every anon wondering- I don´t really see myself as an artist filling books or galleries with my genius, this is meant as some sort of pun.)

I don´t even think this 'crazy' must be taken with negativity but as always when a thing of importance approaches in life everything seems to pause and concentrate on this certain incident which makes seeing clear somewhat impossible.

to me, this is the approaching of my literature studies and the performance test that has to be passed that makes me act like a crazy person.

I want it so much it hurts. which actually turned into physical pain today when I forgot to eat and realized at 7PM that all I had untill this point was coffee.

I managed to spend two hours at the hairdresser´s though reading gossip magazines and drinking diet coke. I felt like if there is anything I have control of these days, it might be my hair so I decided to change it. any guess on what I got done?

picture via we heart it.

patterns

I´m starting to see a pattern in my manners lately.

everything starts with chaining myself to the books full of diligence and caffeine ready to take off like a literary rocket. after some time of avid work, let it be reading, taking notes or writing, I realize that a great fortune lies ahead of me according to my coffee grounds.

I think about it for a little while, start making lists about what ewan mcgregor and I will be doing with these endless assets and leisure time in our personal cottage (him singing "your song" to me every night being a priority) in the midst of strawberry fields (yes, that´s where the beatles kick in).

I conceive that while I am able to see my coffee grounds this is a doubtless signal from the universe of my cup being empty. I struggle for like 10 seconds whether to actually make new coffee or get some delicious café au lait from town. grab my stuff and head for the center. decide that nothing compliments white coffee quite like the new issue of vogue. come back and relax a bit from the hard work I´ve done.

think about my evening plans. call everyone to take me OOUUUT TONIGHT, feeling very mimi from rent. actually find someone. never to be seen again.

so stressful. how are your weekdays going?

wearing tunic from strauss. h&m belt. deichmann shoes. random jewelry.

it´s all happening

champagne. lady gaga. field flowers. crazy dancing. braided hair. night time bicycling. mysterious writing on my skin. high heels. damp grass. walking home barefoot.

these are the times and summer hasn´t even begun!

amazeballs, perez hilton would say.

have an amazing weekend lovers, I enjoy you and your comments so much and if I was to raise my glass to all of you this would be very gintense.

dress promod. shoes h&m. random jewelry. sunglasses new yorker.

'I can't do the same thing every night, the same gestures... it's like putting on dirty panties every day.' -Brigitte Bardot

I´m with Brigitte on that one but it didn´t stop me from basically living in this shirt since the beautiful people over at styleforstyle.com sent it to me. when I was to choose one shirt from their stock this put me in a state of cold sweat and serious trouble with the variety of witty fashion-based themes. in the end I had to go with the 'muse' shirt because I am completely infatuated with the idea of muses and brigitte bardot certainly is the perfect blonde hippie girl to take inspiration from.

I also did an interview with styleforstyle which will be up soon! untill then, make sure you check their store and blog.

thank you everyone at styleforstyle!

shirt by styleforstyle. QS jeans. vintage belt. deichmann shoes. random jewelry.